“Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit.” — Proverbs 18:21 (NKJV)
Our words hold weight—especially in our homes. They shape atmosphere. They shape identity. They can stir peace or provoke anxiety. And while we often watch what we say to strangers or at church, we sometimes forget that the people closest to us carry our words most deeply.
Personally, one of my biggest struggles in this area has been criticism. Maybe it comes from a perfectionist tendency or from my natural bent toward teaching. But I’ve noticed how much easier it is for me to point out what needs fixing than to pause and affirm what’s already being done well. It’s not that correction isn’t necessary—it is. But when criticism outweighs encouragement, especially with my husband or my children, it tears down what I want to build.
There was a moment when I realized that I was far more likely to say, “Do I have to tell you again to make your bed?” than to celebrate the effort they had put into homework or chores. And yet, recognizing effort and faithfulness—even when the job isn’t done perfectly—is one of the ways we help our children grow. They need correction, yes. But they thrive on encouragement. Our homes should be places where they’re built up more than broken down.
Scripture says,
“A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” — Proverbs 15:1 (NKJV)
This applies in the heat of conflict, but also in the daily tone we carry. When our default is harshness or sarcasm, our families learn to brace themselves around us. But when our tone reflects patience, even in correction, we open the door to trust.
Jesus reminded us,
“Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.” — Matthew 12:34b (NKJV)
If criticism is what comes out first, it’s time to ask what’s overflowing in our hearts. Sometimes, it’s stress. Sometimes, unspoken disappointment. Sometimes, exhaustion. But the good news is—when we return to the Lord, He softens our hearts again and gives us fresh grace to speak from a renewed place.
Prayer is a cornerstone of motherhood. It’s through prayer that we intercede for our children, seeking God’s guidance, protection, and blessings over their lives.
“The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much.” — James 5:16b (NKJV)
By consistently lifting our children in prayer, we invite God’s presence into their lives, trusting Him to work in ways beyond our understanding. Prayer not only changes situations—it changes us.
We don’t need perfect words. We need faithful words. Words that bless. Words that guide. Words that remind our families who they are and whose they are. And when we fall short—and we will—let’s be quick to ask forgiveness, reset the tone, and speak life again.
“Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers.” — Ephesians 4:29 (NKJV)
Let’s build homes where grace is heard often, where encouragement is normal, and where the words spoken lay a foundation of peace. Because our words don’t just fill the air—they fill hearts. And what we speak today will echo in our children’s lives tomorrow.
And as parents, let’s not be above admitting when we’ve messed up. Asking forgiveness doesn’t diminish our authority—it strengthens our influence. It sets the example that humility is powerful and grace is available. It frees our children to be honest, to confess, and to heal. When they see us take responsibility, they learn it’s safe to do the same.
Next Week: Living with God First
Join us next Friday as we reflect on what it means to put God first in everyday family life.
